ONLINE THERAPY IN WASHINGTON STATE & California

Multicultural Couples Therapy

Strengthen Your Relationships & Resolve Conflicts

You’re Seeking Culturally Responsive Therapy

Culture shapes every aspect of our lives, therefore it’s importan to consider and center these issues when working with relationships.

Competency will be very difficult, if not impossible to achieve because perfection doesn't exist.

The focus should be on a active (not passive), lifelong (not attending one or two training), and providing affirming care (competency is the aspiration).

*I work with 2 people at a time. This can include romantic relationships, work relationships, siblings, and any sort of dyad (e.g. parent-child). I am polyamory & kink affirming.

Your Differences Are Creating Conflict

Differing Upbringings

  • Growing up in an abusive and neglectful environment vs. secure and healthy environment.

  • Growing up with one parent/caregiver vs. two or multiple parents/caregivers.

  • Growing up where moving was the norm vs. being raised in the same home for entire life.

  • Growing up where emotions were denied, minimized, criticized vs. where emotions were valued, important, and made space for.

  • Growing up with a caregiver experiencing mental health or substance use issues vs. a parent/caregiver who didn’t experience such concerns.

Differing Coping Strategies

  • Wanting to discuss conflict in the moment versus avoidance of conflict.

  • Using logic to solve problems vs. exploring and sharing emotions (explainers vs. experiencers)

Religious Practices

  • Coming from different religious backgrounds.

Variation in Display of Emotions

  • Differences in displays of affection and emotions.

    Verbal and non-verbal expressions (e.g. silent when angry, aversion to conflict, shame).

Sexuality & Identity

  • “Coming out” as queer, gay, bisexual, pansexual, asexual, gender queer, non binary, and/or trans during the relationship; navigating new terrains in regards to desire, space, and identity.

  • Exploring racial identity development and how it relates to partner’s whiteness.

  • Exploring gender roles, expectations, and dynamics.

Finances

  • Differences in your relationship with money and material resources.

  • Scarcity, growing up poor versus over spending and growing up financially privileged.

Migration History & Acculturation Issues

  • Being born overseas versus being born in the United States.

  • Forced migration versus migration for education or career.

  • First generation versus second generation.

Relationship Structures

  • Exploring the possibility of or navigating a polyamorous or open relationship.

  • Understanding nuances and complexities of polyamory in a sex-positive, non-judgmental way.

Prioritizing Family

  • Greater emphasis on the involvement and interaction of extended family members in your relationship (e.g. family members living with you).

  • Lack of boundaries around immediate and extended family members (e.g. enmeshment, codependency, lack of privacy, over sharing information).

Mismatched Cultural Expectations

  • Expectations and assumptions around gender roles, involvement of extended family, emotional expression, and communication styles.

Language & Miscommunication

  • Feeling excluded from your partner’s family of origin, particularly if you are not fluent in your partner family's native language.

    Being triggered by your partner’s verbal or non-verbal communication style based on past traumatic experiences.

Impacts of Trauma

  • You want to better understand how trauma impacts your relationship (identity, esteem, intimacy, trust).

  • You want to better manage your triggers.

Couples Therapy Can Help You

✔️ Fight more effectively, manage and deescalate conflict

✔️ Increase healthy communication and boundaries

✔️ Increase intimacy and vulnerability

✔️ Rebuild trust

✔️ Parent healthier children after surviving a traumatic childhood

✔️ Understand yourself and your partner better

Healing Is Possible

There is hope.

I’ve worked with couples with a history of trauma who are now able to manage their triggers, de-escalate, and connect to one another with joy and freedom.

I’ve worked with survivors of trauma who are now parents who want to parent healthier children and break the cycle of trauma.

I’ve worked with therapists and social workers who are wounded healers.

I’ve work with professionals who feel exhausted, overwhelmed, burnt out, and want to take better care of themselves and have stronger relationships.

I’ve worked with couples who are about to get married and want to better understand their partners and their relationship to sex, finances, career, children, faith, and division of labor.

Couples therapy is an effective way to learn healthier skills, manage major life transitions and changes, learn ways of relating, and better understand one another.

Reach out today to schedule a consultation.

Is Couples Therapy Right For Us?

Couples therapy is hard work and requires mutual commitment, honesty, the ability to step back, reflect on your own contribution to the cycle of conflict, time, effort, and money.

I do not work with couples in active domestic violence/intimate partner violence.

Therapy is not the right fit for all couples.

There are other options available such as

  • Retreats

  • Workshops

  • Intensives (longer than 1 hour sessions, usually 3-6 hours at once)

  • Coaching

  • Discernment counseling (if one of you is considering divorcing/separating and unsure)

For referrals to other couples therapists, click here

Still Have Questions?

Start Therapy Today

Starting therapy can be overwhelming.

I’m here to make it as easy as possible to get help.