What Is Relational Cultural Theory (RCT)?

Relational–cultural theory (RCT) is built on the premise that, throughout the lifespan, human beings grow through and toward connection. Relationships are essential to our survival.

We need connections to flourish, even to stay alive, and isolation is a major source of suffering for people, at both a personal and cultural level.

Seeing connection as the primary ongoing organizer and source of motivation in people’s lives transforms the work of socialization into assisting our children to develop relational skills and to elaborate the possibility for mutuality in relationships.

Core Tenets of RCT

• We grow through and toward relationship throughout the lifespan and that we need relationships in the same, life-sustaining ways that we need air and water

• The ideal movement is toward authenticity, mutual empathy, and mutual empowerment

• Our past relationship experiences are enacted in current relationships, leading us to relate to others in unhelpful ways, and resulting in unhappiness and disconnect

• A strong focus on the relationship between the therapist and the individual in therapy.

  • Interactions with your therapist can reflect what is happening in relationships outside of therapy, and therefore provides a safe forum for trying out new ways of relating to others.

“WE KNEW IT ALL ALONG. RELATIONSHIPS HEAL.”

The Four Major Components of Empathy

1. The capacity for emotional response

2. The mental capacity to take the perspective of the other

3. The ability to regulate emotions

4. The level of awareness of self and others

Growth-Fostering Relationships' Encompass Five Essential Attributes, or the 'Five Good Things'

1. Sense of Zest or Energy

2. Clarity: Increased knowledge of oneself and the other person in the relationship

3. Increased Sense of Worth

4. Productivity: Ability and motivation to take action both in the relationship and outside of it

5. Desire for more Connection: In reaction to satisfaction of relational experience

Why Do People Hurt & Disconnect From Others?

RCT points to the ways in which disconnections created by stratified social organization and marginalization contribute to the experience of immobilization and isolation.

Racism, homophobia, class prejudice, and sexism all lead to chronic disconnections that create pain and drain energy in individuals and societies. 

Relational Therapy For Relational Trauma

Traumatic experiences from our childhood and earlier years can also lead to chronic disconnection. We learn to survive by protecting ourselves using a variety of methods (e.g. pushing people away, isolating ourselves, using substances, numbing ourselves, distracting ourselves, over working, trying to be perfect).

Relational trauma is trauma that occurred from those who were supposed to nurture, take care of us, and protect us (e.g. caregivers, parents, uncles, aunts, grandparents, teachers), but did not. This trauma can include physical, emotional, psychological, and/or sexual abuse and/or neglect.

While hurt and pain can occur in relationships, change and healing can also occur in the context of a safe, warm, and trusting relationship. The goal is to develop mutual, growth-fostering relationships using the therapeutic relationship with your therapist as a foundation for other relationships outside of therapy. Because of the focus on developing healthy relationships, this model is particularly well suited to the treatment of people who have experiences of trauma.

Who Can Benefit From Relational Cultural Therapy?

Those experiencing:

• Distress from their family, intimate, professional, or social relationships

• Conflict in your relationship with your partner, due to trust or communication issues

• Pushing away new people you meet, even though you’d like to be friends

• Feeling anxious whenever you interact with people at work

• Anxiety, depression, or stress

• Low self-esteem

• Poor body image

Relational Therapy In Seattle, WA

Questions you can ask yourself to better understand your relationships with others and yourself, particularly in how you trust, engage, disengage, and handle conflict.

• Who are the people I trust in my life? What are their names?

• What are some of the qualities of these people I trust?

  • Openness

  • Respect

  • Curiosity

  • Warm

  • Peaceful

  • Loving

  • Joy

  • Calm

  • Generous

  • Kind

• When did I learn to trust these people?

  • When I first met them

  • When they did something for me

  • When I did something for them

  • When I met their other friends and family

  • When they stood up and advocated for me

  • When they helped me with something

  • Days

  • Weeks

  • Months

  • Years

• Rate the following from a self-rated scale from 0-10 for some of the people in your life (0 being lowest, 5 average, and 10 most satisfying):

  • I feel safe with this person

  • I trust this person with my feelings

  • This person trusts me with their feelings

  • I feel supported

  • I feel like I am important

  • This relationship is mutual (give and take)

  • I feel comfortable enough bringing up issues, concerns, and conflict with this person

  • I trust we can work things out by communicating our needs

How Can Relational Cultural Therapy Help?

• Learn to identify how you may be pushing others away rather than attracting them and also come to understand how these behaviors are related to past experiences

• Explore how internal defense mechanisms are often activated in order to protect yourself, which leads to even more disconnection

• Develop new ideas about relationships, to build a strong relationship with your therapist, and to use both those new ideas and the therapeutic relationship as a model to create healthier, longer-lasting relationships with others

• Focus on emotional issues, stress, and power differentials from past relationships and how they can interfere with true personal expression and the ability to form solid relationships in the present

• Acknowledge the reality of diversity and inevitability of power differentials, while describing a path not only toward healthy coexistence, but also mutual empowerment

• Explore how relational conflicts and tensions are “normal”, and the importance of repairing ruptures/conflicts/tensions as important toward growth and change

• Name the pervasive inauthenticity and disconnection that saturates many social structures (ghosting and disposability culture), and thus impacts personal lives, is the first step toward transformation

• Being open to being changed by others we are in relationship with